Saturday, April 19, 2014

Acceptance and Feminism

Lol that title sounds really deep. 
This post is not very deep. It's about something that a girl at school told me at lunch the other day, and it was something that was very interesting, and very true. It's also about feminism. Mostly about what she said.
*I also have some questions/comments/disclaimers at the very bottom of the post that I'd like y'all to read :p *
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Feminism: The doctrine advocating social, political, and all other rights of women equal to those of men. (Dictionary.com)
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Let us look at various instances in my life and my rambling, that all leads up to something that Audrey said to me. Something that I had always known, but something that I never knew. It was like when I woke up in a cold sweat a few days after I turned sixteen and whispered to myself "oh. my. god. I'm 16. I'm the same age as Zuko." I knew I was 16, but it didn't hit me until I related it to something so important to me. 
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As my friends and I were eating lunch on Thursday, we overheard someone at another table make a joke about feminists. I honestly don't remember the joke, but it was kind of funny, and the person telling it started with "Don't be offended. This is just a joke."

She continued on, and I half listened, too involved with eating a somewhat messy sandwich to really care that much.


Hashini, one of my very best friends, looked over at Alana and I shyly and said "I've hear 'feminist, feminist, feminist' all the time, but what is a feminist?"

Alana said something along the lines of "Extremists who burn bras and hate men."



I knew feminists have a bad name from the crazy extremists, but, come on, we're not all that bad.

Oh, wait, I never told my friends I'm consider myself a feminist because when I bring it up, they look at me like I'm crazy.

I remember not wanting to mention anything at school that could sound vaguely feminist, because so many students at my school refer to feminists as "feminazis". Sexist jokes litter the side comments in lectures. Encouraging the boys to to better in class "so that they can support a family" is an underlying theme in the school. My history teacher said that "feminism is useless and only hurting feminists cause.*"


I dare you, Mr. History Teacher, to tell that to Malala Yousafzai, who was shot because she believed girls should be educated. Tell that to the woman who used to cut my mom's hair, was kidnaped as a child because her necklace hung outside of her abaya. Tell that to the poor girl in Steubenville, who's rapists were pitied by the news, their futures mourned, while she was shamed because she couldn't stop them. Tell that to my friend who's pastor told her "Your parents wish you were a boy", even though that was not true. Tell that to the women all over the world who are treated as less because of their gender!

Maybe the US no longer needs feminism on a grand scale, but much of the world still does. Until you can tell me that in ever nation across the planet women are safe, allowed to learn, and treated equally and with respect, I will not stop being a feminist.

I go to a Christian school, and, honestly, I believe Christians more than anyone should be the most likely to support equal rights. Of course, it doesn't work like that. One time in class, some guy made a really sexist joke. I was too slow to react, and then someone else chimed in with "Oh, don't say that in front of Lexi, she's one of those feminazis."

Tell me- how many feminists have killed by the millions simply to make their point?

None. 


I stayed silent about my views on feminism, because I see the flaws in the system and realized that it is not the best word to attach to my name. So I was ashamed. 

But I guess God did not want that. 

I looked at Hashini and told her "Not all feminists are that bad. I consider myself a feminist, but I don't really like telling people that, because of the... misconceptions and extremists attached to the name."

Because, let's face it, there are the extremists that Alana mentioned.

After I said that Audrey (who is someone that I really admire, she's in our performing arts class, and is an amazing actress/singer/person) turned around from where she was sitting and said something relatively profound to me.

She turned around and said, "But if you hide that your a feminist, then you can never make the image of a feminist better,"

Woah. That wasn't some "be yourself and support what you want" crap, that was actually pretty insightful. And she didn't stop there.

"If feminism is seen as something so bad, then there are more people, louder people giving it a bad name then there are people who are doing the right. It's like being a Christian. Do you hide being a Christian because of the negative stereo types? Of corse not! You do your best to show people the good in Christianity. Just because you're Christian doesn't mean that you're... oh, I don't know, an over-zealous 'dirt-bag republican' that everyone makes us out to be.

You need to treat feminism in the same way. Don't hide your beliefs because people have a negative view of them. Instead, change that view, be the good that people see in it. Be the one who people look up to and say 'That's what a real... whatever... looks like'. There's no use hiding yourself, that doesn't help you or anyone else."

Beautiful



(I give some credit to myself for paraphrasing her)
She has a point, though, and not just about feminism. It really applies to many other aspects of life (like how she mentioned Christianity). I just thought I would share with you.

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*In some ways he is right. Like the extremists Alana mentioned. People see them and distance themselves from feminism. I see his point, but in the context of the time, he was wrong.

I realize that feminism is a mix of good and bad. Feel free to ask me questions on any of my beliefs. I'm not exactly going to walk around with "feminist" painted on my forehead. Nope. I'm not going to be a crazy internet activist, either, because that would get me no where. I'm just going to continue to support the girls all over the world who still are not treated equality. Also, hating men is not feminism, that's sexism.

Obviously I paraphrased Audrey, but I do remember quite a bit of what she said, and I did my best to keep it to that.

My post on Kraken Con will be up soon. And hopefully my FMA/FMA:B comparison will be up by mid-June. Sorry, but school's busy, and it doesn't allow for me to write a full-blown comparison on two shows. I'll try to get my art up on time  (May 1... I'm doing two months/one post), but I can't find my camera's charger!

I'm thinking of changing my blog's name. Idk what to, but I'm not sure if I want to. Any suggestions?
Also, I may change my internet name to ShaakThusa, because that's more... me. (mash-up of Shaak Ti and Aithusa, my two main internet names. Obviously I would still just be called "Shaak", but still)

Let me know how you like the Verdana font, I find it easier to read, and I hope y'all do, too.

And a page just shared this on facebook, and I feel like it's relevant.






7 comments:

  1. Indeed. Those people who call feminists 'man-haters' are mistaking them with misandrists. Extremists are not the majority. I totally agree with Audrey. No one should hide their feminism. The society might *seem* equal, but deep down it still isn't.
    I'm fortunate to live in the better parts of my country, so I don't receive a lot of discrimination here (but that's probably because I'm already labeled a freak), but gender stereotypes are still everywhere.
    We've had a female president before, but the situation is nowhere near good. Women still don't have as much freedom as men. We're taught that boys will be boys and there's nothing we can do to change that. I feel like everyone's brainwashed into believing sexism no longer exists in my country. Most girls at my school don't care about feminism because they don't feel like they need it anymore. I can only talk about feminism with certain friends, especially those from other countries that I meet online.
    I probably won't be one of those front-liner activists when I grow up, but I'll support feminism mainly through the fictional world - by creating female characters that girls in my country could look up to (they need better ones). It's... safer that way, considering the fact that we still have ultra-conservative idiots running around here.

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    1. "Boys will be boys" is one of the worst phrases. It can be used as an excuse for anything :( Yeah, it's the same here. There's people who speak out agents the sexism, but they're just shut down by society and even though they are heard, they just can't make a difference, because not enough people are willing to make one. Exactly, so many girls think that "oh, well, we're in America, we're free, we can vote, we have almost equal payment, so we don't need feminism". But what about all of the other countries where women are treated as less?

      I wouldn't be a "front-liner activist", either, but supporting it through stories and how I act. Honestly, I think doing it that way would be more effective, because then people won't scream "FEMIINIST", they'll just be "oh, ok, cool. Female lead. Nice person. let's read the book.".

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  2. I find the Verdana font more readable, yes, though it's a less fancy XD.
    I don't know. What are you interested in at the moment? Or, what do you think is really 'you' in general? Something related to FMA or anime? Sorry. I'm not very good at coming up with blog titles. I came up with Knights Underground because I just love Jedi who don't fight in the frontlines, and because I just happen to be a bit of a two-faced rebel at school.
    Oh and, sorry for the long post... heheh.

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    1. Haha maybe I can find an in between font :p
      Yeah, I'm super into FMA haha! Maybe something like "The Artist Alchemist" or something... hmmm.
      haha it's all good, long posts are fine XD

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  3. This was quite the interesting read. I always thought feminism was bad, mostly because that is how I was raised and I also never knew anything about it. Sure, woman should have the same rights as men....but that's about as far as it gets with me. Its just....meh. I dont feel incredibly strongly nor incredibly apathetic either. I'm kinda just...there. lol.
    But either way I did find everything you had to say incredibly interesting. Audrey should be given mad props for saying that because that was really cool.

    Overall, good post!

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    1. Thank you!

      Yeah, I know where you're coming from. It's not a topic that came up much with my family, so I don't really know what their views on it are.

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  4. My mom's subscribed to my blog by email, so I spent two days freaking out about what she would think of this post. I was pretty sure she'd be fine with it, but still...

    Well, she read it last night, and this morning she said that it was a great post and we had an interesting conversation about it :)

    then my dad read it and corrected my spelling haha :p

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